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Pages: First relationship after divorce failed too.... [1]
Author Topic: First relationship after divorce failed too....
faustina

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Posts: 4

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2011-06-16 8-57-29-

First relationship after divorce failed too.... I was on cloud nine after I was finally free from my x year marriage... I met someone new and was even MORE happy. Here I am x years later... I realize that my happiness allowed me to overlook a lot of things in this new relationship and now that real life set in.. I couldn't overlook things anymore and I had to it off, for myself.... I'm heart broken that I failed again... it's almost worse than when I first realized my marriage was over x years ago. Just be careful who you give your heart to... protect it, it was fragile when I entered into this this "new" relationship and I should have spent more time on ME and repairing it instead of giving it away again so quickly.
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cagley

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2011-07-05 12-28-16

relationships True so true, I to went through a divorce after x yrs. of marriage. My first relationship afterwards also failed but we have remained good friends. I'm content now being by myself. I hope you get to know yourself and find happiness.
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  • christiana

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    2011-07-31 1-15-41-

    I do look forward.. to having someone in my life one day.. I just know as much as I care for this person, ultimately I wouldn't be happy with them.... So I'm going to take a nice breather.. I'm hopeing that once I'm good with "ME"... that "the one" will come along. Thank for your kind words.
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  • Joelly

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    2012-06-05 13-16-01

    it's sad too... because this forum helped me through my divorce and was looking for a little support here now that I'm faced with this... and someone has to be an a$$.... always someone isn't it...
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    feldmann

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    2013-11-24 21-45-08

    The first love after a divorce isn't meant to last--it's meant to heal. It'll take a while, but then you'll realize that it did heal you, and you'll be able to find happiness again.
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    2013-11-26 19-22-21

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    2014-01-03 22-45-32

    Any good counselor will tell you... ... that once out of a relationship, you need to take at least x - x years to work on what you contribute to the problems or you will just attract the same problems again. It's true. I had a x-year verbally and emotionally abusive relationship then a few years later got married to a similar type of man. I hadn't done the work in counseling that I needed to do. My part in it is that I allow myself to be disrespected and condescended, then I get reactive and he then will point out my behavior and around and around it goes. I honestly thought I'd simply made a bad choice before and that the man I ended up marrying was different. He wasn't because I wasn't. Now, I'm in individual counseling and we're in marriage counseling (he won't go by himself) but it's still hard because of deeply ingrained patterns. Moral of the story: examine who you are in counseling and why you were with that person in the first place. Heal, then go look for someone new, otherwise, get ready for more of the same.
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